Thanksgiving Plans...

Happy Turkey Week!

What will you be doing?

Usually, I spend all of Thanksgiving Day cooking dinner and then cleaning up with my sister's help. At my house I make Thanksgiving Dinner (and Christmas actually) because my mom retired from cooking quite a while ago.

However, this year I will not even be at home. I'm going to Chicago (yes, again) this time its because a friend is getting married. The wedding stuff doesn't start until Friday/Saturday but I'll be heading there on Wednesday. I am REALLY looking forward to the possible delays thanks to all this hullabaloo over the airport body scanners. My flight leaves from LaGuardia which is one of the airports that has the scanners so I'm planning to leave earlier than usual. I wonder if I'll get to see any of the people threatening to arrive nude at the airports in protest.
 
Its actually my first time spending Thanksgiving with Alpa Chino. I have no idea what we are going to do. It'll be just two of us. Any ideas? I just don't want to spend the whole day watching pretending to watch sports. Sigh.

I always feel that once Thanksgiving is over, the rest of the year goes by in the blink of an eye. All of a sudden it will be New Year's Eve (another holiday I won't be spending at home) and the start of a new year.

Speaking of which, I really should start looking at apartments.

I am looking forward to 2011 though.

Freebie Cheating With Celebrities

Ahh Kim Kardashian, she's so cool she can home wreck without her knowledge.

I take that back, I don't think she's cool, but I do understand the possibility for home wrecking. 

Yesterday, I was on the phone with Alpa Chino and for reasons I am now trying to remember, he mentioned that Kim Kardashian would be his "freebie" celebrity cheating episode. Apparently if he got the opportunity to hook up with Ms. Kardashian--and he took it--I should be okay with it because of who she is. He said the hookup wouldn't mean anything because it would only happen once and he doesn't have any feelings for her.

I'll give him a tiny bit of credit for saying that this would only happen if we were not married. Apparently if we were married he would NEVER do this, Kim Kardashian or not.

Unfortunately for him, I don't believe him. Its a slippery slope my friends, a very slippery slope. If being in a serious relationship doesn't stop him how am I supposed to believe that a marriage license will withstand the appeal of Kim Kardashian's ass? The license is just a piece of paper after all.

I worry about that boy. Seriously.

Don't get me wrong, its not that I don't have my own celebrity crush(es) that would seriously tempt me to stray. Especially after this conversation. Now that I know that Alpa Chino has no problems with a "celebrity cheat", I am sorely tempted to fix myself up, get in shape, and purchase every tight, short, boob enhancing sheath dress I can get my hands on. Then, I shall work very hard to ingratiate myself in the vicinity of Tom Hardy or Jesse Williams (or both) in order to make sure I complete my celebrity cheating before Alpa Chino is able to.

Jesse Williams. The reason I still watch Grey's Anatomy.

Tom Hardy. Reason #1 to watch the next Batman movie.

If I have a threesome it still counts as one cheating episode. Right, Alpa Chino?

This idea that it is okay to cheat because its with a celebrity you may never see again, it confuses me.
What is the difference? Cheating is still cheating. You mean because somebody gets chased by paparazzi then its okay to hook up with the person "just once"?

Mba nu, odiro ofele etu a. (No, its not that easy).

Of course this is all hypothetical. 

To be completely honest, there is also a part of me--the feminist part of me--that is insulted on behalf of Kim Kardashian. Alpa Chino's hypothetical plan to hook up with her and then dump her to return to me is wrong. Forget the fact that he would be cheating, Kim Kardashian is a HUMAN BEING. Just because she is a celebrity doesn't mean she doesn't have feelings and its okay to have a one night stand with her knowing you don't have feelings for her. Of course if she is up for all that then great--but somehow I doubt she would be.

Again, this is all hypothetical.


If I ever get a shot at Jesse Williams or Tom Hardy, it wouldn't be "just one time" with no feelings attached. It would be multiple times with feelings attached. Of course that would probably mean the end of my relationship with Alpa Chino, but at least after I start dating either Tom or Jesse we can host a party and introduce Alpa Chino to Kim.

So, dear readers, what do you think about "one time" freebie cheating with celebrities. Yea or Nay? Is it okay and would you forgive your partner if it happened? Hypothetically, of course.

Update: It has been brought to my attention that in writing this post I violated the terms of the treaty mentioned in this post by using a certain word (previous readers know what I mean). Alpa Chino has ordered kindly requested that I take down the sentence in question. In the interest of maintaining peace, especially with us spending this long holiday week together, I have decided to allow him this. Sigh.

Growing Old And Signing Treaties

This past weekend, Alpa Chino and I had a serious, mostly, conversation about maturity. We both reached the conclusion that we are adults now (it may surprise some of you that we had not already established this) and that it is time we began acting like adults in a relationship.

I'll share some examples of the ways, I think, our relationship was/is lacking in "maturity".

I sometimes pinch his cheeks for no reason, and I mean the cheeks on his face mind you. We'll be sitting on the couch, watching TV or something, and then all of a sudden I'll reach over and pinch! I know that this annoys him but he lets me get away with it--sometimes. Other times he attempts to tickle me to death in retribution and I am very ticklish so this usually leaves me gasping for breath. Also, he frequently refers to me as "dingbat" while I use terms like "barawo" or "ode". Sometimes ALL these things happen in the order that I have just described.

For reasons still unknown to me, this weekend I decided--and he agreed--that we should exclude certain words, actions, and phrases (such as the infamous "You'll be just fine" which has begun to irritate even Mogaji) from our vocabulary.

We talked about it the way some couples might discuss a prenuptial agreement. I agreed to cease and desist any and all cheek pinching. He agreed to allow me to continue to call him "pookie"--at least I think he agreed. Before you say "aww", I would never call him "pookie" in public lest he lose some "manliness points". Although by writing this I guess I have called him "pookie" in public. But its all good since most of you don't know who he is. Also, there will be no more use of the terms "dingbat", "ode", or "barawo" by either party.

There are other points to the "treaty" but there's no need to go into all of it.

This got me thinking about Chuck and Blair's "treaty" a few weeks ago on the Gossip Girl episode War At The Roses

I'm glad we reached an agreement. Most of the "immaturity" that needs weeding out from our relationship is because we were friends long before any of the "serious stuff" cropped up. Its mostly residual "friend play" from our pre-relationship days when we were younger and it was okay to do certain things.

When this relationship moved past the "friend" stage and we became "official", nothing really changed. Well...a few things changed, but the core of our relationship remained the same based on a very tight friendship. However, that core has since been upgraded with all the things involved with being in a "serious relationship" and we just need to reflect that.

I don't know if I'm explaining this properly.

The fact is, we are old and we are way past that "friends" stage in our relationship. Planning to move in together, attending family events, relocating for each other, those are not the acts of people who still jokingly call each other "barawo".

Of course this does not mean that we are going to lose all of the fun in the relationship, its just going to change a bit.

Old School

Today at work I found out that a new staff member is actually an alumni of my university. As a result, and don't ask me why my brain works like this, I decided to revisit the website of my alma mater just to see what was up.

I went to the website and ended up in the "prospective" student section because I wanted to see how the school plans to convince people to attend. I had just enough time to do this today.

As I went through the virtual tour and looked at all the places I knew so well, I was amazed at the wonders and benefits of Photoshop. Is my school really that glossy or is it that after being there all those years I got so used to it that I took it for granted? Did my dorm room really look that spacious or was it just all my crap that made it seem small? Was the food really delicious or was it just that my palate became jaded after many semesters there?

The reason I wonder about these things is because by my senior year I could not wait to get out of there. I was chomping at the bit to graduate, despite the crazy economy at the time, and it would have taken a hefty sum of money to convince me to spend one more night on campus.

I haven't been to the campus since I graduated, and I can't understand my classmates that pay frequent visits. To be honest there are only a handful of scenarios that would make me go back there. Looking at the website now, I wonder if perhaps I misjudged my old school. Mind you I am referring to aesthetics. Academically I don't doubt that it is a great school and for the degree I graduated with it was a great choice. However, maybe the internet is right and I judged the school too harshly.



I am sharing this story because it is a great example of something we all do. We all "look back" and doubt.

As we drive down this road of life there are times when we look in the side-mirror and/or rear-view mirror and we wonder if we made the right decisions at certain times (this analogy sounds a bit pretentious to me, by the way). It may be about something unimportant like whether or not your dorm room was too small, but it is usually about important things.

The reality is, I lived on that campus for 4 years. I ate there for 4 years. I KNOW that school. Internet or not, I was able to experience it for myself and it is not as great as it looks online. I know the negatives and my feelings will not be swayed by the glossy "photoshop-ness". 

Many things look great in retrospect, but sometimes its best to remember the reason you felt the way you did then. Did you have valid reasons? If yes, move on.


I guess the best place to apply this would be to old relationships. Have you ever been sorely tempted to return to an ex because the memories are so great? Its always a great idea to ask yourself WHY that person is now your ex. Its especially important to ask these questions if you are in another relationship. Things didn't work out for a reason, and sometimes that reason is still an issue.

Ironically, I just added an ex as a Facebook friend. Don't worry, I am not going to fall victim to the "reunited on Facebook and it feels so good and leads to cheating" illness. Things ended for a very important reason--I cheated.

Don't Let America Scam You.

This past weekend, I visited Chicago to use up some airline miles. Oh...and to visit Alpa Chino. On Friday evening, I was forced to had the pleasure of watching the Bulls vs. the Celtics.

Basketball is not that bad, but there are other things I'd rather watch on a Friday evening, ahem...Thursday night's Vampire Diaries/Fringe/Grey's/Community. I was watching the game and the commentary reminded me of a conversation I have had with Alpa Chino in the past concerning the NBA draft.

As I understand the draft, after Alpa Chino's explanation, each year new pro-basketball players are ranked from best to worst and NBA teams are ranked from best to worst. The worst NBA teams are actually allowed to have first pick of the new pro players and usually pick the best players. So, the worse your NBA team does the higher your chances of picking a great rookie for your squad.

Apparently, this is done because the NBA has some bass ackwards (a** backwards) sense of "equality" and is trying to help the worst teams improve their squads by having first choice of rookies.

To me, this is all bullsh*t. Instead of teams like the Lakers/Celtics to have first choice after playing a great season, they get to sit by and watch a team like the Washington Wizards get first draft pick.

To be quite honest, my beef is not with the NBA or the teams.

The NBA is a business and to make money they have to keep people involved. Keeping people involved means that the NBA has to sell the hope that "one day" your team might win a championship (here's looking at you New Jersey Nets fans) thanks to a top draft pick, a pair of Nikes, and some Gatorade.

Sidenote I saw Lebron James' Nike commercials and I quite believe he is as vain as 7 peacocks. (I chose "7" because that is the number of years he has been pro without winning a single championship).

Basketball probably wouldn't be so popular if the same teams simply kept rotating championships--oh wait that already happens! Despite all this "equality" NBA draft foolishness the Celtics (17 Championships) and Lakers (16 Championships) are 1st and 2nd in terms of championship wins. The distant 3rd place team, the Chicago Bulls with 6 championships.

Like I said, my beef is not with the NBA. This NBA draft thing is simply an example of a larger pretense that goes on in America. The pretense that you don't have to come 1st to do well and/or be rewarded. After all, is it not a form of reward that the worst NBA teams get to pick the best rookies?

Have you ever attended a school competition involving children in the US? Often there are 1st, 2nd, and 3rd place prizes and then everybody else gets some sort of "participation" ribbon/consolation prize. Not to sound like an old lady, but when I was "growing up" either you came 1st, 2nd, or 3rd. or better luck next time. No "participation" ribbon for you.

They came 17th! Hurray.

The scam is that this "participation" ribbon syndrome only lasts up to a certain point! The fact is, beneath all the pretense, America is--and always will be--a "1st place" country. In the "real world", 1st matters. Sometimes it is all that matters! Your "participation ribbon" will only get you so far in this country so don't let them lull you into a false sense of "accomplishment" with their paltry rewards for "doing your best."

Don't be scammed.

If you are not an American you need to understand this. No matter what you see on TV, ask yourself this; if Americans were as "stupid" as much of their image projects then would they have gotten this far? Would they still exist? Don't let them fool you into underestimating the amount of work and intelligence it takes to keep this country afloat.

Disclaimer: This post was not intended to cause any insult to fans of the Washington Wizards and/or New Jersey Nets. The fact is, these two teams will one day win an NBA championship--it will probably only take another 20 years or so, just keep hope alive!

Lets Get Political!

This weekend, I went to DC for the Rally to Restore Fear And/Or Sanity. Over 200,000 people decided that it would be a great way to spend a Saturday and we all gathered on the National Mall in Washington DC to basically enjoy a 3 hour Daily Show/Colbert Report.

There are a few things I learned in DC this weekend.

The WMATA (Washington Metropolitan Area Transit Authority) is quite annoying. I think the problem with the WMATA is that it cannot decide if it is a subway system (like you find in many cities) or if it is a suburban train system. If it were a subway system it would run more frequently and efficiently; but if it were a suburban train system it would be completely fine for it to run whenever it felt like. I have been in Times Square after New Years Eve celebrations and the crowd was not as ridiculous as what I had to deal with on Saturday trying to get to the National Mall.

The Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear was a VERY mixed crowd. "Pundits" will try and tell you that it was mostly "young" people. This is complete rubbish. I saw blue collar types, white collar types, grandparents, babies, teenagers, college students, black people, white people, orange people, Indians, Nigerians, Chinese, Muslims, Christians, tea partiers, Democrats, Republicans...you get the point.

My souvenir. Lol

US News Media are like babies. After the rally, almost every news organization and anchor covered the rally with an attitude that can only be described as "snarky". They all had amused smiles on their faces as they asked "So what has the rally accomplished? Will it make people vote?".  The rally was not about "voting" or "politics". It was simply a way for normal people to get together, enjoy a Saturday, and show that most Americans are not the extremists that are shown on the news everyday. The press seemed united in their condescension towards the rally. I have a feeling that it is payback for Stewart and Colbert's ever increasing popularity as a replacement to "regular" news. Also, it probably didn't help that both Stewart and Colbert roasted the media during the rally.

Sha, it was a good trip.

On a related note, today is election day in the US. I know that Democrats are in trouble but the only Democrat I feel sorry for is Barack Obama. Every single Democrat in Congress and the Senate deserves the sh*t storm that is about to descend starting tomorrow if when the Republicans take over the House of Reps. It serves them right. I cannot believe that they managed to squander all the goodwill of November 2008 in two short years. I feel bad for Mr. Obama because I cannot imagine how he is going to preside over a Democratic Senate and a Republican House. Mind you I am being optimistic that the Democrats will still hold the Senate when I wake up tomorrow.

On the other hand, the Republicans should not get too comfortable in their seats. If they win today they must understand that they only have two years to prove themselves. There is a very high probability that the Democrats will be back in power in 2012. If the Republicans get to Congress and start holding the country ransom so that they can get their way, they better realize they are writing their own death sentences.

It has always been my belief that Democrats are too soft. If a Republican president had been swept into office on the tidal wave of support that Obama had in 2008 there is no way they would not have strong-armed their policies into law--bipartisanship be damned. I applaud Obama's efforts at reaching across the aisle, but there is only so much peace making that you can do before its time to crack down. I hope the Democrats have learned their lesson. You cannot please everyone. Its time for them to go hard or go home.


P.S: do you know that my Mozilla Firefox dictionary/spellcheck STILL sees "Barack" and "Obama" as typos? For real Firefox? Sheesh.

P.P.S: Here is a video showing some of the great signs that people made for the rally! If you didn't make it, you missed out! Next time.

Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear
I Have a Sign
www.comedycentral.com
Rally to Restore Sainty and/or Fear The Daily Show The Colbert Report